Ranting and Raving, a Lonely Lunatic

NWA sent me a final e-ticket confirmation last night, one that I was supposed to print out and use to check in to the airport. I scanned through the information, reaffirming when and where I was supposed to be, when I noticed that suddenly, I had an eight hour layover in Detroit, when before, I knew it was only 1/2-1 hour. Instead of getting into New York at 3:30 in the afternoon, it would be 11:00 at night. I tried following their links to change my flight, but nothing was coming up. "Well," I thought, "surely they can change this at the ticket counter at the airport. Might be the easiest way." I drove to the airport, walked in... and found out that they can't change flights. I could only do it online or on the phone. (So, how do they deal with overbooked flights then?) Frustrated, I left the airport and met up with Mom for lunch. While there, I thought of something: I was accessing the website on Firefox on my Mac. I started up a virtual installation of Windows XP, fired up Internet Explorer... and changed my flights so I was still getting into New York at 10:30 at night, but I would only have an hour layover in Detroit. No where on their site that I could see does it mention that you can only use Internet Explorer. Bad web design, NWA.

It might be the PMS, but I'm in a really bad mood. This trip is frustrating, work is frustrating, friends are frustrating, and my messy, empty apartment is frustrating. I almost want to take my car and drive, no destination in mind, away from everyone and everything I know. Leave it all behind, and maybe, just maybe, never come back. I'm not entirely sure that this is a good state of mind to go to NY with. I'm likely to be miserable there the entire time or be miserable when I return home, yearning to be away. But I can't leave home, not now. I have nothing to support myself with, financially or emotionally. At least I have something resembling stability where I'm at now. I guess, if I really want to attack the root of the problem, I just want someone to greet me with love when I come home, but I know I wouldn't be able to deal with the life of the person that comes with it, not now. Damned if I do, damned if I don't. I can't really think about that much anyway, not till next January.

*sigh* I hope New York is the restart I need on my life. Even if only a partial one. I need to get out of this rut of self-pity and self-loathing.